Rob Abrazado (flatvurm) wrote,
Rob Abrazado

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I do things, but I neglect to write about them

A bit over a month with no blog post. I'm a lot rustier at this than I thought I would be. I did, at some point, jot down a few notes that I would catch up on "next time I post," and now, of course, the notes are basically meaningless, since they were just little ideas that I was sure I'd remember when I needed to. That's been happening more lately, I've noticed. And by "lately" I probably mean the last few years. My brain doesn't perform like it used to. Part of me understands the inevitability of that, and part of me is terrified by that, but so it goes. Those aren't mutually exclusive ideas; something can be both inevitable and terrifying. I guess most inevitable things are terrifying, come to think of it.

Yeah, let me not get into yet another crisis of mortality. Where was I?

So, yeah...catchup. It seems close to a fruitless endeavor. The first week of January was a rough one, I know that. I had a massive bout of insomnia, and I mean the likes of which I haven't experienced in a very long time. It was so bad that I super overslept and missed some work the next day. The end of that week was Gb's birthday, I remember; just the three of us celebrated. I took a couple pictures. I'm trying to get better about taking pictures. I'm still pretty bad about taking pictures with me in them. I should do some more of that.

The following week was a lot better. I felt very organized and productive. That is a feeling I would like to experience more, both at work and at home. I'm trying. I'm taking small steps. I try to keep a to-do list. I try to keep on top of the deluge of information that continuously pours into my digital life. That's probably a whole post unto itself, actually. Let's put a pin in that.

I was hoping this year would be the year I'd have a lot more gaming to talk about. So far, that hasn't really materialized. We've made some small advances in getting a game going that I would run for Tb and Gb. We've basically just done some quick setting prelude and worldbuilding stuff -- just ideas; not like we've actually written stuff on character sheets or anything. Finally got to break out Backstory Cards for honest-to-goodness use in the field, which was personally gratifying to me. This is all heading toward a D&D game. D&D5, to be exact. Under ordinary F20 circumstances, I would much prefer 13th Age, but I'm honestly just caving to tradition here; I feel it's important to a young teen boy to play D&D. I mean it's not like he's never played an RPG, but I feel like he's barely played an RPG, you know? D&D is a nice, solid, time-honored way to start. I dunno, we'll see. I don't want to get too ahead of myself here; let's actually get some dice on the table before I start pontificating.

Anyway...January progressed. Felt like a long month. I had a lot to deal with. I had a fairly significant anxiety flareup. This was remarkable mostly in that it did not send me down a depression hole, and it also didn't wind up with me hiding under the covers, which has happened in the past. I owe a lot to therapy generally (and my current therapist specifically) for equipping me with more and better tools for dealing with mental health issues. I was able to remain largely functional during the episode, which actually was one of my longer ones. I clocked it at like 10 days, if I recall correctly. Makes it hard to blog, too, actually, come to think of it. was what it was. It was bad times; I made it through; things are better. More likely than not, this is just going to be life for me sometimes now. That's something I've had to learn.

February's been all right so far. Heh, "so far"; it's almost over by now. Indulged myself on Groundhog Day with a ceremonial viewing of the eponymous film. Gb had a school dance; a formal, I think? I'm grateful to no longer have to live that life. He seems to handle such things much better than I did as a lad, and I'm happy for him for that. He has a lot of his mother's arrogance, I think, and I mean that in a good way. Maybe "confidence" is a more diplomatic way of saying that. I think all three of us, actually, deal with various aspects of superiority complexes, but mine definitely does not translate into any kind of confidence in social situations.

Chinese New Year has come and gone. I guess I don't celebrate it as heartily as I used to, which is what comes of not hanging out with so many Chinese people anymore, I suppose. I did make some fish and noodles, though, so hopefully that'll help bring good fortune and whatnot. (I'm trying more curry experiments these days. Moving in kind of a Thai direction. Coconut milk.) It's the Year of the Monkey now.

Anyway, the main point of me actually sitting down and posting today was that lucidam and I are back from a weekend away at Wicked Faire. The final Wicked Faire, as a matter of fact; it's being replaced next year with something called Glimmerdark. (Which, incidentally, while still in Febraury, looks like it's moving a weekend or two earlier, which means maybe I can hit Dreamation next year!) Wicked's been Tabitha's and my Valentine's Day for a few years now. She gave me lots of candy. :) We picked up some leather goods. She paraded around her amazing Maleficent cosplay -- lots of compliments and attention and requests for pictures. She seemed pleased and validated by that, which of course makes me very happy. In the moment, I tried to fade to the background, as I do under attention from strangers, but I was very happy that all the time and effort and stress of making the costume reaped such rewards. Very proud of her. There are pics on her FB.

As tradition dictates, we went to the Voltaire show, which was excellent as always. This show also was not shy about commemorating the final Wicked Faire, and so it was an event to remember, and I'm glad we were there for it. Gb loves Voltaire, too. It has probably bummed him out a bit that he's not been old enough to come to Wicked Faires all these years. Tabi is, of course, a superfan, and I've gotten to the point where I could sing along with some of the songs. I like the music. I'd pursue more, I think, including the back catalog, if I had much time for music anymore. Feels like I don't have time for much of anything anymore.

Speaking of that, I should wrap this up. I took my customary Day Off From Work After a Con today so deal with con drop and infostream catchup and unpacking and whatever other aftermath. Just now remembered I meant to do laundry, but that didn't happen. Oh, well; I did a lot of other stuff, so I don't feel guilt about that. Also took the time (during lunch) to sit down and watch The Rundown again, which is something I'd been meaning to do ever since hearing that it was on Netflix. So that was time well spent; great action movie. I mean, True Lies is maybe still on top, at least in the American style, but The Rundown is five? Anyway. Oh, also, I picked up a few games at Wicked, too! Batman Fluxx for Gb, Codenames for whenever party games are needed again, and Deck Building: The Deck Building Game because...well, I told myself I would when I first heard about it, because who can resist that good a pun.

Yeah, games. I should definitely be playing more games.

On that note, I'll call this a post. I know it wasn't dripping with excitement or personality, but that's just the kind of day this has been. I'm trying to get caught up on backlog, so this is the output expression of that. This is my blog post equivalent of just marking a shitload of stuff "read" in my RSS reader so I can not have to think about it anymore and just focus on what comes next. So, as always, we'll see how things go in the future.

You know what I should start doing? I should start seeing how much time I spend writing blog posts. I think this might have been like a half-hour or so.
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